The Ultimate Cheat Sheet for Heart Break Recovery - from Renee Tarot, Author of "Broken Heart" on Amazon
The Ultimate Cheat Sheet for Heart Break Recovery - from Renee Tarot, Author of "Broken Heart" on Amazon
Don't Be So Hard on Yourself!
Be Nice, But Watch Who You Hang Around!
One of the reasons I am writing this blog post is because this past week the U.S. celebrated Thanksgiving, and though my marriage, which ended in 2013 (I always thought it was 2012 for some reason) was one of the darkest, gloomiest periods of my life, I found myself in the position of helping the object of my hurt. I believe this is a new stage in the heart break journey so I wanted to share it with you.
Later I discovered a more natural way of healing heart break -- though just as, if not more powerful. Amethyst(AD) , which is a stone, who's energy, much like Aleve, will lesson the pain of negative emotions, is called the sobering stone because it keeps all that extra that you really don't need in check! I never go out without either a bracelet, a necklace or some type of earrings with this stone, which is like medicine that affects you from the outside sort of like a patch. Now all of the stones that claim to be amethyst do NOT work, so make sure you use an authorized dealer and stick to the jewelry that works for you.
Anyhoo, my ex remarried and consequently his wife no longer wants anything to do with him.....go figure. So he is virtually homeless, moneyless and distraught, and even though I think he planned the circumstances that I am about to tell you of, I think I handled it the best that I could.
So homie called and offered to keep the children this week, but at the last minute said he'd lost his car keys and had no transportation. Really?!? We offered to come help him find them, or should I say I offered because I REALLY wanted a break and I know he can be absent-minded sometimes. Being a single mom is not easy, but that is another encyclopedia so we will stick with the subject at hand. The kids and I went to help him find his keys (he's an OTR truck driver), but to no avail. It wasn't long before he also confessed that he'd lost his ATM card and needed $200 to have a new key made. At this point I knew I was being played, even though I should have known when he first called, but he used my desperation for a break against me. Sometimes being a Piscean sucks.
The children were watching me so instead of using profane language and spitting on him for ruining my week, I decided to invite him over for a meal and shower -- it was the day before Thanksgiving. He was also welcome to call a friend or one of his other girlfriends who could pick him up somewhere away from my home. He came over to the house and complimented me on how well I was doing and how nice and tidy my home was....I could tell he was trying to get back in -- not because he loves us, but because he was trying to help himself so he was quite humble and agreeable. I was VERY MUCH AWARE of who he really is, even though I keenly remembered that he showed this same behavior years ago, but I totally missed it then. Wow people, please observe these folk, wait and stop going after relationships for sex!
He slept overnight on a couch in the basement and proceeded to invite his mom over (without my knowledge) to pick him up on Thanksgiving day (right at dinner time) even though he knew we were not speaking, but he also knew she was looking for somewhere to go. I noticed that the children acted a bit different around him also, somewhat detached, but they are older now and can see what is really going on.
I allowed him to have breakfast and then promptly escorted him back to his truck to live his life. I wished him a Happy Thanksgiving and he said nothing back to me in return. Sorry, it doesn't work anymore with me buddy. The End.
Now What is Going to Happen?
Well, knowing him, he will try to get back to my residence for a comfortable place to stay until he can get another girlfriend who will let him live with her. Yep, that is his plan, which by the way will never happen, and I know because even though being a Pisces sucks, we are kind of psychic when we don't squash the feeling for personal gain. I can officially say, I am completely over this shit because I was able to help this dude without being emotional and happily send him on his merry way -- so to answer the question above, NOTHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN, at least not with him.
Men and women you should be very careful because these rejects are walking around everywhere and they will convince you that they have feelings that they don't have in order to get a warm place to stay and food in their bellies. Be careful out there!
Remembering the Feelings of Depression and My Advice to Those Who are Depressed During the Holiday Season
It's been about four days since this occurrence and I am about to go to the gym to work off some of this sweet potato pie and turkey that may still be stored in my body. For some reason, this morning I began reminiscing about the deep and intense sadness I had over this loser.
In my book Broken Heart(AD), I write about the week of Valentine's Day, 2013, when I felt the most despair that I have ever experienced in my life, besides dealing with infertility, (which is another set of encyclopedias). I had allowed this man to use me for close to nine years, so since he had identified me as a source for whatever, he didn't leave, and I had no vision of who I would be with. I could not see the future. I suffered from regular fits of spontaneous crying and a hurt so deep because I knew that he was with other women...you see he wasted no time, in fact he was in a full fledged relationship during the marriage with me. I was overweight, had cut off all my hair, felt used and abused and had no where to turn. The thought that was going through my mind was I really need someone to help me.
One night, after putting the boys to bed so that I could go to my room in the basement and cry, I was sitting on the couch there feeling such intense darkness and hopelessness. Suddenly I felt a presence in the room and though a wild wind did not come into the space, I did feel a coolness and a change in the room's temperature. Immediately, the depression lifted -- it was gone. It was almost like I was placed in a special, invisible room where that hurt could not get in. It became difficult, if not impossible for me to visualize his face, or to see him with other women -- it was all just blocked. I waited for it to come back later, however it did not. From that point on, anytime I started to feel upset about the situation, the tide would just change and I could only get emotionally involved to a degree, but not to the degree that I had before my help came. Yes, I still cried and got upset about the situation, but it never became hopeless and that previous despair never returned. This energy or spiritual medicine that I was given resulted in the book Broken Heart(AD), and it has kept me these past two years to the point where I am today.
As a result of the medicine, I love better than I use to and I don't get as upset. When I meet a man who is not perfect, I allow him to be who he is and I have maintained relationships that are more normal and friendly, but less desperate. The impression that I received was that my deceased grandmother brought me the healing balm, but I don't know who brought it, I just know it came and that it was another, invisible personality that brought it. I did not really care, I was just happy that whoever he or she was brought the stuff to bring me some relief!
My hope is that somehow, I can pass this healing balm onto you who are hurting and broken because it is soooo special, and I cannot lay hands on all of you to pass it on to you. I am praying for you, and I wrote this song, which you can download and listen to absolutely #free with one click -- hopefully some of the medicine is in it for you....
RT